champagnepapi

Hey @champagnepapi interesting topic. Vaginismus can be a real struggle for people. The best place to reach out for help is a GP who can refer to a sexual Health specialist and a sex therapist. In our Sexual Health Clinics we are more focus on STIs and BBVs.

How were you able to move past that relationship @champagnepapi? I’ve been in a few, intimate and non-intimate toxic relationships and it’s always taken someone else to notice something is wrong before I ever ‘woke up’ to what was going on. I found the leaving hard because I was often co-dependant too and lost a sense of self while I was in these…[Read more]

I’m glad this thread started last year, it’s really comforting to see so many stories from people and how they managed/are managing things! It makes isolation feel a little more normal.

It’s week, idk, 12? maybe more now @champagnepapi? And I am Feeling it. I live with my partner and it’s been great, I have someone to talk to and some support…[Read more]

Thank you @champagnepapi and @nurse_nettie! Good to know it’s normal. With pain, I quite often will have intense stabbing pains in my left side, which happens on and off my period. I’ve had an ultrasound and there are no cysts but I think it could be PCOS or maybe endometriosis related? I haven’t been diagnosed with either, and my gynaecologist…[Read more]

Hey @rolldaniel

Definitely agree with @champagnepapi here. Sexuality can often go through peaks and troughs and also people just go through peaks and troughs in terms of how good they are feeling. Perhaps just leave it a bit for now and work on enjoying each others company and building a relationship. Then when the time is right you can both…[Read more]

Hey @rolldaniel

Definitely agree with @champagnepapi here. Sexuality can often go through peaks and troughs and also people just go through peaks and troughs in terms of how good they are feeling. Perhaps just leave it a bit for now and work on enjoying each others company and building a relationship. Then when the time is right you can both…[Read more]

@champagnepapi @yogigirl

Hi everyone, thanks all so much for your ideas and thanks particularly @goldenrose for linking that other thread.

@champagnepapi

We ended up just not having sex because I didn’t want to do it without a condom! Unfortunately this happens sometimes but I honestly wasn’t even in the mood anymore because of it. It’s good to…[Read more]

Thanks @champagnepapi and @aunt_flo 🙂 It’s definitely been weird getting used to single life after such a long time with the same person! I’ve been taking lots of time to explore new hobbies and getting my new home set up, so it’s all feeling very positive.
Thanks for the great advice. I think as i’m not wanting to rush into anything the slow…[Read more]

Mhmm true @champagnepapi.

I’ve not had to navigate any conversations around flirting – it’s just not something that’s ever come up and been a problem. But, we have had a pretty frank conversation about imaging what it would be like to date other people. To be honest, I think it relieved us both to admit that while we had no interest in break…[Read more]

I’m with @champagnepapi – There’s no need to rush into anything, or force yourself to be comfortable with seeing new people straight away.

I guess one way to ease into it would be to think about the up side of sleeping with a new person. Yes, it can be awkward, but it’s also a chance to connect with someone, learn about someone, and perhaps have…[Read more]

Hey @kris, I totally know what you mean that it can be challenging to flirt online. I would agree with @champagnepapi that it takes the pressure to ‘flirt’ off if you treat it like a conversation. Be chatty and always be yourself. I would also say that I find emojis useful to lighten the tone and be a bit more cheeky. Throw a wink in there every…[Read more]

Hey @champagnepapi, it can be a real challenge! I have found that as time goes on and the ‘honeymoon’ phase ends you get comfortable with each other (which is great) but the intense passion can fizzle out. It can be fun to try something different like toys to get some excitement, or maybe role play?

In terms of the non-monogamy, I think it works…[Read more]

Great minds @piperr42!

I think outdated ideas of gender and femininity definitely play a role in the way we view body hair, @champagnepapi. I remember in high school we were talking about dominant and recessive traits and seeing what one we had. One trait was hair on the fingers (close to your knuckles). I was soooo embarrassed that I was the…[Read more]

Thanks for your advice and thoughts @champagnepapi !

I guess being a 30yr old male, I only know a handful of mates who are still virgins but a lot of other friends I know for sure aren’t 😅 but yeah I’m not ashamed or afraid of still being a virgin and I definitely don’t judge anyone who is not a virgin, as I believe sex, love and intimacy is a…[Read more]

To be honest @earthmama, having a dip in my sex drive has sort of made me reevaluate how I see myself, rather than how I see my relationship. We’re going okay through open communication (and a bit of frustration) but it happens! With my relationship with myself, it was like…if I’m not a sexual person, then who am I and what do I offer to a…[Read more]

@champagnepapi super interesting to think about implicit consent and how risking it is to not obtain complicit consent. I think this highlights our cultural discomfort with verbalising and passionately expressing what we really want, as well as our reluctance to hear it from other people. It’s as if we would prefer to bumble through not knowing…[Read more]

@champagnepapi I totally hear you on this and it likely that you would have to get over these things. There is a great episode on ‘You Can’t Ask That’ (which is freely available online) that chats with people in non-monogamous relationships. I love the way a particular couple is super honest about how they’ve dealt with envy over the years but…[Read more]

It is great to hear your honest opinion and lived experience @aunt_flo. Do you ever worry what the lack of spark will mean for your relationship now or down the track. Obviously, this is a totally normal and expected experience, but I wonder how it feels for you in the midst of it and whether it makes you second guess anything?

@champagnepapi I…[Read more]

@champagnepapi am I being hopelessly romantic? I must admit I agree with you…even though my wildest dreams look a little different, until with have a viable replacement, I do think they are here to stay.

Hi @champagnepapi, it’s great that you’re keeping a log of your periods & are keeping aware of changes. Having a period is a result of a complex hormonal cycle that ranges over 4 to 6 weeks (21-42 days). In fact no period cycle is exactly the same as the one before. It may mean that every 6 months your cycle lasts longer.
A common reason for no…[Read more]