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[Nurse_Nettie]

Hi @shadeowz, it sounds like you’re a little frustrated, but sex is very different for everybody. There’s a wide sexuality spectrum, which means there are many people who love the person they are with but don’t want to have intimacy or sex. This is called asexual and aromantic identities or ACE.

You said this is a first relationship for you both, so perhaps your boyfriend hasn’t worked out yet what he wants or likes or feels comfortable doing. This can take time for people to work through and can sometime cause sexual anxiety for the person but having good communication with each other does help. Remember, any intimacy must always be consented to by you and him, so pushing the issue is not going to help either of you.

I’m not sure what the preliminaries for him are but you mentioned he has a mental block that prevents him from having sex with you or touching you. This probably needs to be explored more with him, so you both can be open and honest on what you both want and need from each other in your relationship. You may want different things, and this is ok, as it may help you decide where to go from here.

[Nurse_Nettie]

@apopa, It sounds like you’ve got lots of questions about penis size . This forum isn’t always the best platform to answer. Can you email Nurse Nettie or call SHIL (NSW Sexual Health Infolink) on 1800 451 624. It’s a free & confidential call. Thanks.

[Nurse_Nettie]

HI,
A wide range of penis and erection sizes are normal. An average depends on what population is chosen; how accurate the measurements are. Self-reported data is normally inflated.

Genetics, environmental conditions can all play a part in length.

Try not to be concerned with length and remember – A flaccid length is a poor predictor for erect length.

[Nurse_Nettie]

HI,
A wide range of penis and erection sizes are normal. An average depends on what population is chosen; how accurate the measurements are. Self-reported data is normally inflated.

Genetics, environmental conditions can all play a part in length.

Try not to be concerned with length and remember – A flaccid length is a poor predictor for erect length.

[Nurse_Nettie]

The amount of ejaculate released changes all the time. If a person with a penis goes a few days without sex or masturbation , they’re likely to ejaculate more. And vice versa if you masturbate often within a short period it can be reduced.
Factors like smoking, diet , genetics and overall health can also impact the amount of semen and ejaculate. Age is also a big factor. Those with a penis produce the most semen in their early 30s. Maintaining hydration can also assist.

[Nurse_Nettie]

Hi, @caldude27 you can send me any questions via https://playsafe.health.nsw.gov.au/nurse-nettie/ and it will come through to my inbox that way 🙂

[Nurse_Nettie]

Hi @caldude27, It’s unlikely you’ll get anything from what you’re describing. The fact that you’ve washed your hands with soap is the most important factor in the context. Feel free to email Nurse Nettie privately for future private concerns.

[Nurse_Nettie]

Hi @worried-dude, sorry it’s taken so long for me to respond to you! This is really common question people ask me! First of all STIs transmitted through fingering might be risky if there’s mutual masturbation & lots of precum, ejaculate or vaginal secretions that’s exchanged between partners. Often these body fluids are used as lubricant & if shared may be a risk for infections like chlamydia or gonorrhoea. It’s important to know that infections like HIV are NOT transmitted this way & there’s never been one reported case! If fingering is one way only (one person giving to the other) then it’s safe ???? .

The other thing that’s important to know is that like you, sex workers want to look after themselves and stay healthy. In fact, sex workers as a population group are far better at getting a regular STI screen than the general public tends to be. For this reason, sex workers are actually one of the lowest risk groups for infections such as HIV.

So in short, the encounter that you have described sounds very low risk not only for HIV, but all STIs. If you want more specific info call 1800 451 624 between 9am-5.30pm Monday to Friday to talk with a sexual health nurse (like me). It’s confidential & free if you call from a landline. I’m also here if you need anything else.
Play safe,
Nurse Nettie

[Nurse_Nettie]

@fiona6666 Hey Fiona, I appreciate your need for in depth information. Why don’t you email me directly with your questions so I can reply to you personally? Thanks.

[Nurse_Nettie]

HI Fiona666 – I didn’t use a specific article to source this info – I am telling you from all my years of knowledge as a sexual health nurse.
If you want more specific info please call SHIL 1800 451 624.

Thanks
NN

[Nurse_Nettie]

HI Fiona666 – I didn’t use a specific article to source this info – I am telling you from all my years of knowledge as a sexual health nurse.
If you want more specific info please call SHIL 1800 451 624.

Thanks
NN

[Nurse_Nettie]

@fiona6666, yes you’re correct, HIV would not survive outside the body with or without latex/plastic and will die off very very quickly.

[Nurse_Nettie]

Hi @Apopa,
Thanks for your question. Penis growth happens during puberty. But the changes happen slowly and over a period of time. It’s not a single event and each male is different. The first puberty change is the enlargement of the testicles and scrotum. Penis enlargement begins about one year after the testicles start enlarging. The penis will continue to enlarge in both size and length as you move through puberty. Sleeping on your stomach does not affect growth. And there are no specific tips or tricks to speed the process. Your body will go through many changes through the teenage years. Hair growth, wet dreams, changes in voice, and acne. Growth happens over many years and there’s no need to rush 🙂

[Nurse_Nettie]

Hi @Apopa,
Thanks for your question. Penis growth happens during puberty. But the changes happen slowly and over a period of time. It’s not a single event and each male is different. The first puberty change is the enlargement of the testicles and scrotum. Penis enlargement begins about one year after the testicles start enlarging. The penis will continue to enlarge in both size and length as you move through puberty. Sleeping on your stomach does not affect growth. And there are no specific tips or tricks to speed the process. Your body will go through many changes through the teenage years. Hair growth, wet dreams, changes in voice, and acne. Growth happens over many years and there’s no need to rush 🙂

[Nurse_Nettie]

@fiona6666 great question! To put it simply, HIV as an infection is harder to catch generally. Even during insertive anal or vaginal sex there has to be a lot of the virus present in a large amount of precum, ejaculate or vaginal secretions. HIV also doesn’t like living on dry or “keratinised” skin, so it’s incredibly difficult for it to be transferred from bodily fluids to another person via their hands or fingers.

Even catching gonorrhea and chlamydia through mutual masturbation, whilst possible in theory, is still unlikely.

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