As a young woman you don’t learn how to pleasure yourself

This topic has 14 replies, 10 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 4 months ago by MintMilano.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 15 total)

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April 14, 2017 at 1:37 am #106391

MsBlueStreak
Participant

About damn time this became something we talk about:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/2016/09/18/7-celebrities-get-real-about-female-masturbation/

In high school, I intimately remember the usage of hand gestures that would have taught even the most daft male what to do. And boys/men are often told that masturbation is the thing to do to help balance and imbalance in sexual desire – but nobody ever seems to say similar to a female.

Thank you very much Emma Watson, Lena Dunham, Amy Schumer, Eva Longoria, Miley Cyrus, Anna Kendrick, and Shailene Woodley for putting some words to this.

April 15, 2017 at 2:39 am #110450

NickiPower
Participant

I love how it’s now becoming socially acceptable to talk about it!

April 18, 2017 at 7:15 am #110451

Curiosity
Participant

Has anyone else seen the OMG yes that Emma Watson talks about?

April 18, 2017 at 3:25 pm #110452

ElleBelle
Participant

I looked into it @Curiosity but from memory it was $60+ to sign up, and I wondered if I was ready to spend that much money learning new ways to masturbate 🙂

April 19, 2017 at 2:56 am #110453

MsBlueStreak
Participant

@Curiosity, I’d heard of it, and checked out the website.. but never subscribed. I’d also looked at a similar thing from the Kinsey Institute (that I can’t recall the name of)

April 19, 2017 at 10:06 am #110454

Curiosity
Participant

@ElleBelle When I signed up it was $30 and that was a few months ago, they break it down into I think 9 different methods and have a for lack of a better word simulator (touch responsive screen) that gives instructions as well. It would be confronting if you weren’t expecting real women showing you what to do.

@MsBlueStreak Is it the Kinsey confidential?

April 22, 2017 at 2:50 am #110455

NickiPower
Participant

@Curiosity Is it actual instructional videos of women themselves?

April 26, 2017 at 3:04 am #110456

MsBlueStreak
Participant

@NickiPower Quoting from OMG Yes’ website:

See the How and Why

Watch videos where women explain
and demonstrate how the technique works for them, how they discovered it and
why it feels so good. No scripts, no actors.

Then, Try For Yourself

With the world’s first touchable
videos, as you touch, you get feedback in real-time so you can fine-tune. Get
it wrong. Then get it right.

So it’s videos (of real women), but touchable video.

November 8, 2017 at 4:24 am #110457

tea
Moderator

Bringing this back because why aren’t women taught how to feel good? Boys are taught it’s totally okay and it’s socially acceptable but as soon as a girl gets down with herself it’s a dirty thing?

I didn’t even know HOW to masturbate at first because how would I? I went through a lot of meaningless rubbing because that’s what guys did so it’s the same right? I spent a long, long time seeking out some accurate information on how to masturbate in a way that made me feel good, and in different ways. I still don’t really see or know of any good resources about female masturbation + techniques.

Does anyone have some good (free) resources?

November 9, 2017 at 11:49 am #110458

Aunt_Flo
Moderator

I think I’ve shared this one elsewhere but it’s too cute not to share!

November 12, 2017 at 5:36 am #110459

peachy
Participant

@Aunt_Flo omg that’s adorable! Reminds me a bit of one of my favourite clips https://vimeo.com/222111805
@tea Erika Moen has some amazing sexual health comics including one on how to masturbate! https://www.ohjoysextoy.com/masturbate/

November 14, 2017 at 12:06 pm #110460

Aunt_Flo
Moderator

@peachy god that video is so cute, and informative!

December 11, 2017 at 11:46 am #110461

veryelle
Participant

I don’t know about everyone else but as a kid, I was told that I should not touch, or let anyone else touch my ’private parts’, and some adults would call them the ‘naughty bits’ (even now we say that jokingly). So I always felt quite guilty masturbating, like I was doing something wrong. I am so pleased that some big names are coming out and ‘normalising’ masturbation!

December 12, 2017 at 9:34 pm #110462

EarthMama
Moderator

@veryelle That is so true that masturbation begins with feelings of shame. And what a shame! I know it took me a long time to really cross that ‘guilt’ barrier also.

December 13, 2017 at 5:41 am #110463

MintMilano
Moderator

@tea I guess it depends on a lot of factors in your upbringing, but I think the shame around masturbation definitely affects both boys as well as girls. sometimes you’re told it natural or normal but other times you’re told you’ll go blind or grow hair on your palms if you touch yourself!

I think the biggest difference might be the mechanics of it all? in terms of teaching someone how to masturbate, for boys its just “simulate the friction of having sex until you ejaculate”, and boys can see their penises so I guess they’re more likely to discover it on their own. but vaginas (well, vulvas and clitorises and all those wonderful parts) are a little more dynamic in how the produce pleasure, which might not be as… intuitive, I suppose? like after reading the thread about the Mirror Thing it seems like the female sex organs need a little more “getting to know you”, I think. sorry if my ramble of thoughts got confusing there.

but regardless, young women absolutely deserve the sexual autonomy to masturbate so I am all for this type of education!
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