That was um…nice?

[Aunt_Flo]

What would you say to someone who’s trying their hardest, but isn’t quite getting you there? Is it okay to lie to spare feelings, or should you try and break it to them? What’s the best way to bring this up?

[v4wanndii]

That’s a really good question @Aunt_Flo Actually, I had this problem when I first dated my boyfriend. In my case, I just talked to him about how I wanted to be as happy as he was when we had sex. I think he felt awkward at first, but i kept on  saying about how I loved him and wanted to continue our relationship for  a long time.  He was very cooperative. And he asked me what he should do. I think you need to start a conversation, just find a right moment, mood and words.

[NickiPower]

You could also suggest other positions that help you enjoy it better @Aunt_Flo – mixing it up a little and perhaps taking control may be something you both enjoy. 

[Aunt_Flo]

Sound advice, guys! It’s always a difficult thing to bring up, and can often be hurtful to partners if not phrased correctly. 

[Kit]

Interesting. I think it really depends on your relationship, too.

In the case of a casual hook up you might not bother mentioning anything or alternatively feel freer to be blunt about it. Personally, I would never lie though.

[RoseHill]

I always find it helpful and slightly less awkward, and can even be incredibly sexy to suggest trying mutual masturbation during sex. Sounds a bit out there but it can be as simple as stimulating your own clitoris during penetration or asking your partner to show you how they would touch them self while you watch. 
I usually use a vibrator on my own but when my partner and I decided to bring it into couples play it really heated things up for me!

[Author]

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