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Home › Forums › Sex & Relationships › threesomes?
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Hey @curious – are you looking for any info in particular or just whether others have tried it? In my experience, sex with multiple partners necessitates a lot of communication and setting boundaries so everyone is clear on what’s ok and not ok. Before you start looking into finding a partner, it’s worth having a discussion with your boyfriend about what sort of role this would play in your relationship. Ask each other questions like: would it make you jealous to see them with another partner and vice versa? Is this going to be a once-off or would you prefer to have a more open relationship? Would it be with someone you know or a stranger?
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Thanks for sharing a bit more context @curious. I think it’s great that you and your bf communicate so openly about sex, and that he wants to make sure you’re enjoying yourself. Having said that, you guys have only been sleeping together for a pretty short period of time and your bf seems to be suggesting quite a lot of adventurous stuff. In your other thread we discussed that it’s not unusual that you haven’t yet had an orgasm. More people doesn’t necessarily translate to more pleasure, so approaching it like a solution to climaxing probably isn’t the best way to frame it.
Everyone’s experience and situation is different so what worked/didn’t work for others may not be the same for you. The decision will ultimately be yours, so what was your first gut reaction to his suggestion of a threesome? Does the idea actually sound appealing to you, does it turn you on? Do you trust the person he wants to include?
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Hi @curious great to see you’re able to have such open and honest conversations about sex. It sounds like you’re not that interested or turned on by the idea which is fine but it’s important you communicate that and don’t feel pressured to do anything because your friend or bf would offended if you didn’t. If you don’t want to do it then please don’t. @ElleBelle is correct, the more does not always equal the merrier, take your time and don’t worry to much about not having an orgasm yet.
@curious I’m going to have to echo what @ElleBelle and @CloakOfAsh have had to say. It’s good that you’re having a conversation, but make sure that your feelings on the topic are heard (any form of sex needs to be totally consensual on the part of both parties, or it’s not consensual).
Me personally, I had enough trouble in my misspent youth negotiating relationships and casual sex between two people – I had no inclination to get involved in a three-party sort of thing (and I had no problem saying so either).
Hey @curious, definitely agree with the others that while it’s great to be having this conversation make sure that your needs and wants are heard. If you aren’t consenting to this, and don’t want it, don’t go ahead with it – you won’t be offending anyone at all. Always remember – your body, your rules.
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I like the tagline @NickiPower – your body, your rules <3. I wish someone had said that to me when I was younger, just so I could feel more confident in putting my foot down.
Good on you @curious for speaking up with your boyfriend. It’s inspiring to see such an open and respectful relationship.
Sending you a high-five @curious! Way to go for having the conversation and awesome that your BF listened to how you felt!