The second video is great. Sex positivity is an excellent concept, but I think there’s a lot more to it or to sex in general than ‘you can sleep with whoever you want, whenever you want etc.’ Sometimes I feel like sex positivity is a little…lipstick feminist-y?
I really, really like that the second video addresses that sex positivity needs to encompass people who don’t want sex often, or at all for a variety of reasons.
Something I felt was missing in the discussions is masturbating. To me, that’s part of sex positivity. I think sex positivity largely surrounds penetrative sex, and misses out on self pleasure, which is still an important part of a sex life.
The second video definitely gives more to think about. I personally think the whole ‘sex positive’ thing can actually be quite a difficult concept as it’s not actually as easy as ‘just get out there, and have all the sex’.
You’ve gotta meet someone you actually want to sleep with first 😅
Good point about the masturbation too! I definitely think that should be part of it.
Totally agree with what you said about including asexuality in the sex-positive narrative though @aunt_flo! Definitely, something that gets left out all of the time and frames sex in a way which EVERYONE NEEDS TO HAVE SEX, which just straight up isn’t true. Maybe changing the language would help, saying ‘intimacy’ and including non-sexual acts in the conversation as well would be better?
Intimacy is a really good way of thinking of it @tea! Especially since touching, even non-sexual does require a consent (I reaaaaally hate being cheek-kissed by people I don’t know well – so uncomfortable!)
I’m really excited about the content hannah has been bringing out regarding more inclusive sex – such as discussing sex and disability!
On another note though – regarding intimacy, how do we let other people know our boundaries? Like, if I didn’t want a hug but someone went in for one, how could I let them know gently that I don’t want to be touched?