When it comes to asking your sexual partner to put on a condom I feel like it can be quite awkward, personally I feel like I might kill the mood by having to stop and put one on but once it’s on we just pick back up where we started and I think ‘why did I stress about asking?!’… How do you go about asking? Is there certain things you do or say to make the process more comfortable?
I think that’s a good thing to say @aunt_flo, the: “I’ve got them if you don’t” takes away from the awkwardness of the situation and also firmly asserts that you’re ready for some fun SAFE sex!
“please wear one otherwise I’m not going to have sex with you.”
100000%!! Safe sex or no sex! Anyway, I don’t have this problem since I’m sexually active with a female-identifying person at the moment and if we need any condoms on toys I just ask? I guess that’s less intimidating though since it’s not a fleshy penis.
Hi @GoldenRose! I totally get feeling a little awkward asking but it’s just so important to practice safe sex so the potential awkwardness just isn’t an issue for me. I tend to just wait until they’ve put a condom on and like you said, the mood is rarely lost. And yes to carrying around condoms! I’ve noticed more and more that men can be lazy with purchasing them (or hoping I wont want to use them) so sometimes yo do have to take matters into your own hands.
@earthmama“Do you just shut your eyes and pretend that STI’s don’t exist?? :/” ommmgggg good point though!! I never really think about this too much? Same with using dental dams – it never really comes up for me? Such a big concern though…
@tea :/ :/ it’s such a scary thing! Especially when you are not particularly comfortable with the person. Isn’t the hierarchy of comfort levels interesting? We’re fine to get naked and physically intimate with someone, but the idea of being slightly vulnerable and asking them if they’ve been tested, let alone to use protection…terrifying!!!
If anyone has any good tips on how to comfortably ask/insist- I am all ears!!